a wonky blog

2009-02-17T12:59:00.000+08:00

2008-09-25T07:39:00.002+08:00

Incase you didn't know,(and I don't know who still refers to this blog) but I've moved here. Be warned, what youre going to see is a drastic change in the sharene you all once knew.

If you still do look at this blog, thank you for making the effort :)

2007-11-18T01:23:00.000+08:00

well maybe not with cups,
but with oranges and red packets(angpaos)-
sharene gladly accepts angpaos :D

for my demon of destruction

2007-11-09T10:17:00.000+08:00

The ragged they come and
The ragged they kill.
You pray so hard on bloody knees.
The ragged they come and
The ragged they kill.
Down in the cool air I can see.

---
for all i'm able to build up,
likewise is the ability to tear down.
these walls that keep me caged-
wont you let me fly into the endless sky?

---

Run and kill-
Destroy the will;
A hero that doesn't exist.
Smoking gun-
Well I am the one;
A bullet hole in your fist.

2007-10-25T12:31:00.000+08:00

LIEK GRAWR! :D

:)
He's the man alli en la disco,
playing sexy felling hotter,
he's the king bailando et ritmo ragatanga,
and the dj that he knows well,
on the spot always around twelve,
plays the mix that diego mezcla con la salsa,
y la baila and he dances y la canta

----------------
Now playing: Mario Vazquez - Gallery (Spanish Version)
via FoxyTunes

2007-10-21T20:00:00.000+08:00

yeah, havent exactly been blogging for awhile.

i guess, it's just that blogger's too boring and plain?
blogger's served me well these 3 years,
but i got bored crahh.
:/

we'll see where i go from here aye?

2007-10-18T09:34:00.001+08:00

WAHHHHHHHHHH-
can jump off the building alr.

-hmph
pufft!

the interview with God

2007-10-17T10:21:00.001+08:00

THE INTERVIEW WITH GOD

I dreamed I had an interview with God.
“So you would like to interview me?” God asked.
“If you have the time” I said.
God smiled. “My time is eternity.”
“What questions do you have in mind for me?”

“What surprises you most about humankind?”

God answered...
“That they get bored with childhood,
they rush to grow up, and then
long to be children again.”

“That they lose their health to make money...
and then lose their money to restore their health.”

“That by thinking anxiously about the future,
they forget the present,
such that they live in neither
the present nor the future.”

"That they live as if they will never die,
and die as though they had never lived.”

God’s hand took mine
and we were silent for a while.

And then I asked...
“As a parent, what are some of life’s lessons
you want your children to learn?”

“To learn they cannot make anyone
love them. All they can do
is let themselves be loved.”

“To learn that it is not good
to compare themselves to others.”

“To learn to forgive
by practicing forgiveness.”

“To learn that it only takes a few seconds
to open profound wounds in those they love,
and it can take many years to heal them.”

“To learn that a rich person
is not one who has the most,
but is one who needs the least.”

“To learn that there are people
who love them dearly,
but simply have not yet learned
how to express or show their feelings.”

“To learn that two people can
look at the same thing
and see it differently.”

“To learn that it is not enough that they
forgive one another, but they must also forgive themselves.”

"Thank you for your time," I said humbly.

"Is there anything else
you would like your children to know?"

God smiled and said,
“Just know that I am here... always.”

-author unknown

2007-10-16T23:36:00.000+08:00

tired atm.
found my goal in life again this morning.
happy.
motivated.

these hands.
we did not say that we are perfect by admitting to being a Christian,
rather we proclaimed that we love God.

who's to say that there is a perfect being, in flesh, on this earth?

and i'm looking for a new bloghost,
blogger's interesting but rather stagnant.

2007-10-12T23:41:00.000+08:00

class was amusing today,
didn't feel like the usual.
It began with an 'exercise'
of sorts- pull up blinds, look out of window,
gaze adoringly at the funny looking buildings.
okay well, maybe not the adoring part.

so anw, class didnt feel like class.
we had 1 and a half hours to finish our tasks-
with THREE people.
juz wundahful.
yes, we couldn't actually finish it on time but we sure tried.

During first break, Sam got mixed up with all the food
kingston told him to get and it was so hilarious! :D

Cause we weren't able to finish consuming our food on time
for 2nd meeting, so during the 2nd break's beginning-
chris, sam and i went to the pantry to chomp.
they kept suanning me when we were at the pantry just now,
what liek banglas eating food liddat.
sit at one corner and eat-
i nearly choked ah :P
thank heaven's the emobit was there,
else i'd prolly not last beyond that mouthful of food. :P

and during the 3rd meeting,
Chris was nice enough to donate
half his bottle of water to me
when i was dehydrated like a dried fish.
no jokes abt fishes ah! :)

class ended at 3+pm today, darn early.
didnt actually know what to do,
so i went to disturb ivan and see what movies he has :P

watched Benchwarmers on Ivan's laptop just now.
and here i thought he was gona send me some other stuff :P
okay la,so i'm liek suaku- didnt watch Benchwarmers before.

Yucks, the boogers in Benchwarmers are super retarded O.o
lol man.

anw, selamat hari raya to the malays out there, aye?

and vivian, dont cry.. hope everything's alright with you okay?
there'll be a way out, no worries! :)

2007-10-12T00:32:00.000+08:00

tired.
just finished RJ not long ago-
feel like switching bloghosts,
but i know that i shouldn't be concentrating on those.
Talk about a malfunction of priorities. =/

dont know what's exactly wrong with me nowadays,
as though it's been a dream that i might not have awoken from.

i'll do my best at Enterprise class later,
though i still have the feeling that she still doesnt like me-
I'll do what i can :)

---

as pertaining to that situation-
let me assure you.
contrary to her name
sharene does not share.

aye, not going to elaborate on this.
I need my sleep for tomorrow's class! :D:D

SLEEEEEP!
(yet again the question is raised- no rest for the weary,aye?)

2007-10-10T23:06:00.001+08:00

i'm damn unhappy with myself.
i dont understand.
heh.

2007-10-09T23:59:00.000+08:00

oops, forgot to paste this here.

i think there were some pretty good presentations today,not good
because of content- but because they touched upon topics that we
didnt really think of yesterday. For one, it's Khabir's group and
Iskandar's group.

Khabir's group- because of the thought they have ventured upon,
which is moral paradoxes. It sounds like an inverse moral paradox to me-
to try to help someone,
yet to be punished by someone for helping
them. so i was just wondering, if that's what happens to people then
why would they still try to help them? I think that's a very good
branch within that topic- that point alone(that they've put it on
their slides) should, i think, give them an A. Actually i didnt know
they existed- but thinking deeper,
it's highly possible and quite true.
I think that's super thought provoking and
a point that most of us didnt actually point out.

Iskandar's group- becuase they touched upon the topic of the beauty
of speech/debate/arguments. I seriously didnt think of it that way,
and though I got abit muddled at what they're saying(halfway
through the presentation- oops! pardon me, aye?) i think that
the concept that they have touched upon- should give them an A.
It is the ideas that they've raised that is highly interesting- I'd have to
say that if both their team's didnt get As, i'd be confused abt it.

---

tmr sci! :D
wonder what's going to be the problem :):)

---

Psalm 42

1As the hart panteth after the water brooks, so panteth my soul after thee, O God.

2My soul thirsteth for God, for the living God: when shall I come and appear before God?

3My tears have been my meat day and night, while they continually say unto me, Where is thy God?

4When I remember these things, I pour out my soul in me: for I had gone with the multitude, I went with them to the house of God, with the voice of joy and praise, with a multitude that kept holyday.

5Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted in me? hope thou in God: for I shall yet praise him for the help of his countenance.

6O my God, my soul is cast down within me: therefore will I remember thee from the land of Jordan, and of the Hermonites, from the hill Mizar.

7Deep calleth unto deep at the noise of thy waterspouts: all thy waves and thy billows are gone over me.

8Yet the LORD will command his lovingkindness in the day time, and in the night his song shall be with me, and my prayer unto the God of my life.

9I will say unto God my rock, Why hast thou forgotten me? why go I mourning because of the oppression of the enemy?

10As with a sword in my bones, mine enemies reproach me; while they say daily unto me, Where is thy God?

11Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted within me? hope thou in God: for I shall yet praise him, who is the health of my countenance, and my God.

2007-10-09T22:25:00.000+08:00

Advocating Experiencer

You are an Advocating Experiencer.

You are an Experiencer

.Your inquisitive nature, imagination, and hands-on practicality make you an EXPERIENCER.

.Although you have an active imagination,
you also concern yourself with the functional elements of things.
.You are willing to experiment to find things that work the most efficiently.
.Getting stuck in certain habits is boring to you—
you'd rather find new experiences.

.Accordingly, experiences are more important to you than objects—
you'd rather spend your money and energy on events
and adventures than on material things.
.You like to contemplate a lot of options before making a decision,
and you're willing and able to consider a lot of different angles to problems.

.You're open to suggestions, and often rely on others
to assess the merit of those suggestions.
.You have an ability to see the big picture—
not just how things are, but how they could be—
in a variety of situations.

.You prefer to have time to plan for things,
feeling better with a schedule than with keeping
plans up in the air until the last minute.
.Generally, you believe that you control your life,
and that external forces only play a limited
role in determining what happens to you.

If you want to be different:
.Have faith that your imagination and practicality will complement each other,
and lead to good decisions on your part.
.Take the initiative in seeking things out—
don't wait for them to come to you.
how you relate to others

You are Advocating
.Being social, empathic, and understanding makes you ADVOCATING.

.Some people find being around others exhausting—but not you!
You are energized by spending time with friends,
and you are good at meeting new people.

.One of the reasons you enjoy conversation as much as you do
is that you often learn about yourself while talking things out with a friend;
you realize things about your own beliefs while discussing them with others.

.You have insight into what others are thinking and feeling.
This ability allows you to be happy for others,
and to commiserate when something has gone wrong for them.
.You are highly compassionate, and being conscious of how things
affect those close to you leaves you cautious about trusting others too hastily.

.Despite these reservations, you are open-minded when it comes to your worldview;
you don't look to impose your ways on others.
.Your sensitivity towards others' plights contributes to an understanding—
both intellectual and emotional—of many different perspectives.

.As someone who understands the complexities
of the world around you, you are reluctant to pass judgments.

If you want to be different:

.While it's important to think about others,
don't forget to take some time for yourself,
and occassionally to put yourself first.

.Take some time to spend with a few close friends;
although it's difficult to find people to trust, it's worth the effort.

.When you have great ideas, it can be hard to relinquish control,
but it can also feel good to take the pressure off and
enjoy someone else leading the way.

2007-10-09T16:11:00.000+08:00

i hate pitying myself-
like it's going to help anything anyways.
fat load of good it's going to do to situations.

but if i do speak out, i'm going to die.
and if i don't, i'm going to die.

what's worse?
this seems like something out of the frying pan
and into the pot of boiling water.

as sam(wu sheng) says: "you're not gonna die, you're just gonna be screwed."

sighaye.

2007-10-07T16:37:00.001+08:00

on another note, i dyed my hair red last night-
allow me to be a temporary narcissist and let me preen for awhile.
hope i dont look like little mermaid :)

2007-10-07T15:32:00.000+08:00

i missed that feeling of rejoicing,
when both your mind,heart and soul unites to praise and worship-
a love overflowing engulfs you.
i forgot how it felt like.
that peaceful, uplifting feeling.
that feeling of being loved so much that it's overflowing-
that makes you want to give to everyone.

i'm sorry, i forgot.
i'm really sorry, i strayed.
i forgot my priorities yet again.
too many things happening-
and i just forgot my stability-stone.
i just.. strayed.

dont ask me how it's possible,
i think too many things going on just made me lose focus.
i'm so so so sorry.

just forgive me-
say that you're still here.
grant me mercy, please..
just say i'm forgiven..

let me enter His gates with thanksgiving again.
once again

---

Trust His Heart.mp...

"Trust His Heart" by Babbie Mason.
taken and edited from HERE.

Verse 1
All things work for our good
though sometimes we don't see how they could.
Struggles that break our hearts in two
sometimes blinded to the truth.

Our Father knows what best for us
His ways are not our own.
So when your pathway grows dim and
you just don't see Him-
remember you're never alone.

Chorus
God is to wise to be mistaken
God is to good to be unkind.
So when you don't understand
when you don't see his plan
when you can't trace his hand trust his heart,
trust his heart.

Verse 2
He's see the master plan
and He holds our future in His hand
so don't live as those who have no hope
for our hope is found in Him.

We see the present clearly
but He see the first and the last
and like a tapestry He's weaving you and me
to someday be just like Him.

Chorus
God is to wise to be mistaken
God is to good to be unkind.
So when you don't understand
when you don't see his plan
when you can't trace his hand trust his heart,
trust his heart.
(He alone is faithful and true
He alone knows what is best for you).

2007-10-07T00:38:00.000+08:00

yawnz.
tired.
wan sleep.

prune and superman having some male bonding time in msn.
with me innit.
why am i even in it? O.o
what's the diff between dugen and mugen anyway?
but have "gen" innit right?

church later,
can't wait to go back :D
tired, need sleep.
need wake up early.

goodnight world!

2007-10-06T23:27:00.000+08:00

had migraine in the morning,
was crunked,random and hyper.

daddy dropped me at aunty janet's at 9am.
thought there was supposed to be IGmeeting today
(for the rumble thing)
yeah i slept at 3am in the morn-
dont nag at me for that.
anw, dozed off-wokeup-dozed off quite a few times.
all with my laptop on and with music blaring like nothing,
msning the superman and randoming with the bear.
chatted abit with the senior and then dozed off again.
aye, migraines are bad and evil.
dont get them, aye?

OKAY LAH,
so i was supposed to spend the afternoon resting and sleeping-
but my aunt's house is hardly a restful place.

so anw,walked over to bpp's guardian pharmacy to purchase red dye.
before meeting up with the superman in the afternoon at the library.
there was this funny indian couple with a pram,
(while i was sitting beside the woman)
her husband came up to her with a book and said "hey, i picked this book ah"
she was like "but why this book?"
he pointed at the cover and said "cause the cover looks nice".

I laughed like nothing after we were out of the library.
teeheehee, darn funny.
went home then, straight bus from lot1 taken.
the hour seemed to whiz by so quickly-
maybe cause i dozed off :P
or the company i was keeping, hehehe.

got one funny couple behind us.
the guy went "I look at high school musical 2 and a bollywood show
and i see no difference- they look the same.",
"hollywood want to make an indian movie = fail."

superman and i were sniggering at them a few seats infront,
and after they alighted at the police acad-
we laughed and laughed and laughed. :D
AHAHAHA

left my 'diamond-filled', sack of treasure
(or rather, bag of rubbish) at home and went over to gekpoh shopping centre.
CAN THEY LIKE RENOVATE IT?
you have rich neighbours, get them to pay for the renovation or something. O_o

okay i know i'm whining, blah-
excuse my rubbishy few sentences a little way back,aye?
let's not deviate hor :)
went to macs and wanted to have apple pie,
but cause i've got migraine-
that superman dont let me eat it ._.
and not to mention the stuff that i happen to like is fried ._.

thanks though superman x)
you put up with alot of my rubbish ah
teehee

went over to the bigger unenclosed area further down the road
and talked and wasted time at the shelter-
strangely,time passed darn fast :/
and we saw liek LOTS of dogs! :D
big dogs,medium dogs,small dogs,sushi dogs, fluffy dogs,crossbreeds, purebreeds,
you name it- we saw it! :D

that time was entirely well-spent :D
went back home aft awhile,
strangely enough my migraine healed somewhat
while we wasted away at that peaceful quiet 'shelter' :D

time well spent today,
feel tired but no more migrainey! :D
just abit of a stomach ache-
wondering what's wrong with my stomach, so many aches O_o

2007-10-05T23:13:00.000+08:00

and no, i'm not behaving like an airhead-
I never really was sane, so pardon me while
i proclaim my insanity in the next sentences.

dont like airheaded sharene?
DONT READ! :D:D

---

i'm like this bath freak.
I bath 2/3/4 times a day and i enjoy it like nothing.
in the issue of baths- i'm like this hedonist.

now, just awhile ago i noticed something while i was bathing.
my toe itched.
some deprived mosquito bit my toe.
whatthe? :/

of all the places that mosquito could bite,
it HAD to bite my toe?
I mean, my toe has like so little blood-
can't it bite like somewhere else that's easier to scratch?
like my hand or my elbow,but nooooooo!
that desperate,deprived mosquito HAD to bite my toe.
-_-

and dont you dare tell me that i'm supposed to be civilised about this.
since my grasp of english is okay,
then i should be doing this the cultured way-
like complain "that plebeian-minded senseless mosquito"
or something to that extent.

i mean HELLO!
mosquitoes certainly dont have minds!
and mosquitoes are plebeian anyway-
they've been biting people from before the middle ages and all that.
who knows how much of a plebeian they actually are?
like percentage? are you kidding me?!
and that moronic mosquito actually bit my toe!
i'm entitled to complain!

and mosquitoes certainly dont have common sense-
toes have the least amount of blood flow
(not counting some other parts of your body)
so of course, that mosquito won't be able to born
little mozzies with the amount of blood taken!

a few days back during Culture class, we've learnt what-
"to gain something, you have to first lose something".
HOW I AGREE MAN!
to gain an itchy mozzie bite, I have to lose my blood(AT MY TOE).

---

now that i'm done ranting,
1. i want a new blogskin.
2. i want straight As again.
3. I want to score in Enterprise again.
4. I want to transfer to Jaime's Enterprise class.
I know two of the four points is undoable but whatever okay?
I'm in selfdenial.

2007-10-05T16:14:00.000+08:00

AHAHAHAHAHA!

BEAT THAT!

I LINKED EVERY PAGE!
GAVE MORE THAN ONE REFERENCE FOR SOME!
NO MORE COMPLAINTS FROM YOU ABOUT THAT!

MOHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I'MA SIC REFERENCES ON THY PRESENTATIONS.
BWAHAHAHHAA!
LULZ

---

to that moron:

stop trying to guess what's wrong with my family lah.
stop trying to guess what's happening in my life-
if you know then that's great
if you dont,dont be an imbercile and guess guesss guess all your crazy ideas.
it gets irritating very often.

2007-10-02T23:19:00.000+08:00

pride:
-is no reason to admit you're wrong.
-is a stepping stone on which you should push yourself up upon.
-is not something for you to abuse
to use as an excuse for you to think that the world revolves around you.
-is a high or inordinate opinion of one's own dignity, importance,
or superiority, whether as cherished in the mind or as displayed in conduct, etc.
-does not give you the excuse of thinking that you're always right.

If you are always right, then you are certainly not human.
If you are very prideful, then the harder and steeper
the slope of humility you shall fall.

I am not trying to be a smart-aleck,
perhaps you have not understood because you refuse to listen.
or perhaps your heart doesn't wish to because
you feel that it's too complex for you to grasp?
Either way, the only way to get better is to go up-
to first acknowledge knowledge and to have experience is to then gain wisdom.

I'll admit, at first I thought Gavin wants to sabo me.
Then I thought that if I didn't do anything, then no one will learn from it.
Someone has to take that first step-
no matter how much of the similarity you are breaking.

---

yes, i wrote a lil something to reflect some
current situations that are occurring.
conflicting situations occurring throughout my family,
situations involving various people and more than less
others caught in the aftermath.

mercy given from grace abound.
mercy rain, please come on down.
grant that i may have the serenity to accept what i cannot change,
wisdom to know what i can and
discernment to know the difference.

---
for that whom understands the situations,
let them then read the meaning of such:

situations fluctuating and games abound,
emotions rising but love's around.
fighting hard to achieve that state,
of love- pure, innocent and free of hate.
let the tensions rise in unity
in defence of heartfelt harmony.
sanity,warring,peace of mind
tells of defending love- beautiful, simple and kind.

(FYI, yes i did write that. dont ask me how- it just popped in my head.)

2007-10-01T20:44:00.001+08:00

turns out halfway through the day,
3/4 of the class ponned the lesson.

hmm lemme recount(lessee how good/bad sharene's memory is):
-bear
-hot iskandar
-emo
-khabir
-kokliang
-alex
-nadia
-syahirah
-samzilla(littlemonster :P)
-emobit
-myself
we went to watch "Rogue Assassin"-
if you like super action shows where they slice their heads off,it's your show.
Or if you like Jet Li totally pwning evone, it's your show too.

Anw,alice and alyssa went off. Baowei, went off as well.
Sammy went off with his friends and
Vivian went off with her friend to pay her hp bill and er- cut her hair.

the rest(prislin,joanne,maggie,kingston,sammy,vas,MC) stayed for his lesson.

BOHAHA, funn day today-
though i know i'm so totally gonna get liek this D/E.

ALICE'S BIRTHDAY TODAYYYYYYY!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY! :)
dont be so sad aye?

2007-10-01T07:57:00.000+08:00

crunkit.
sharene wants sleep.
sharene wants coffee.
sharene dowan go school.
but sharene is like this wonderfully guai student-
so sharene shall go.

to math class.
on monday morning.

sharene needs coffee.
quick!

2007-09-30T23:19:00.000+08:00

baths are wonderful.
but hot baths like gifts from God.

the defining moment when the heated liquid touches your skin.
that moment when all you can do is to
concentrate on the path the liquid is making on you.

an euphoric instant-
when you let go of your problems and concentrate on the luxurious feeling.

2007-09-30T21:16:00.000+08:00

i'm sorry okay?

but sharene is (unlike her name) very selfish-
she doesnt like to share.

and sharene bites.
liek hard.

go run back to mommy while sharene sniggers at you.

2007-09-30T18:36:00.001+08:00

at superman's desktop now

he's liek supposed to be damn sick-
BLAH.

thought what :P
bohaha

sch tmr..
dont feel like going.
BUT I WILLLLLLLLLLL~!

cause i'm liek such a good student
BOHAHAHA

seems that my fingers and toes are always the ones that freeze first :X
ahwell..

feeling abit like little blue-green riding hood
but ah-
whatever right? :)

2007-09-29T18:55:00.000+08:00

AIYAH I JUST ENCOUNTERED A BAD
EXAMPLE OF THE MALE SPECIMEN LAH.
awhile ago,okay.

LAWL.

grant me the solitude of peace
and the mercy from my pain-
the endurance of your grace
that comes down like rain.

2007-09-29T16:01:00.000+08:00

i dont understand males.

one thing i've learnt is-
to take all guys with a pinch of salt,
you will never know when they will pull your leg.

2007-09-29T15:10:00.001+08:00

sometimes guys are just so sickening.
just causes me to feel sick to my stomach.
now i understand why some females chose to become lesbians.

was walking back from debate meeting just now.
a semi-D was being renovated by several banglas(well okay foreign workers).
the balcony part of the house certainly looks like
something that would come out from a portrayal of romeo and juliet.

no, not the romance-
it must have been taken from juliet's balcony or something
because it sure looked like it.

was catching up with gillian just now aft debate meeting.
talked abt sch,life and lots of other things.

things have changed.
changed in more ways then one.
i dont know whether i should get angry or something.
yeah, sharene's at a loss for what to do.

2007-09-29T01:31:00.000+08:00

for the record, i'm posting the emobit's artistic drawings.
(to be honest, i saw, i stared, i laughed)
FYI:
the first HOT girl was Iskandar HAHAHA

2007-09-29T00:01:00.000+08:00

sicked- physically.
sickened even more by certain attitudes and ways of doing things.
sickened emotionally.

drained by sickness-physical&psychological.
worried for the future sessions.
debate and rumble.
capoeira and enterprise.
capoeira training shall cook fish physically on wed.
enterprise will fry fish mentally and emotionally on fri.
capoeira bbq fish on that fri also.
fri = fish fail = fish faint.
fish faint = fish die.

crunkd ppt- crunkd 3rd meeting.
crunkd duration of 3rd meeting.
appreciation for the classmates who cared and cheered me up :)
muchos love, aye?

left sch 'early', saw wonky sweet joanne with her classmates.
(not the joanne from class)
walked with them to the train station.
met up with superman there.
talked with superman for a looong looong time.
about life and situations and sad stuff and facis that bully little innocent fishes

---
randomness:

luke = addicted to munchydonuts
luke = wants donuts
luke thinks donuts > hot babes
:X

an excerpt from bear and my convo:
(during christina's class in the 2nd meeting)

emo rabbit = emobit
emobit evolves to memobit.
hot iskandar evolves to flamiskandar

2007-09-28T15:44:00.001+08:00

what's her problem
why the heck is she picking on me?
why is she so unreasonable
damn it

2007-09-28T10:39:00.000+08:00

stomach hurts :(
legs ache
back hurts
olfactorial overload
in school
in HER class

i'm dying

x.x

2007-09-26T22:31:00.000+08:00

For the record, after ranting like 2 and a half times at different places-
I finally wrote an email to Miss Christina,
but only after I stopped frothing at the mouth and was rational enough to think.

Read below, but at your own risk.

---

Good evening Miss Christina,

Pardon me for intruding upon you with my email,
but I'm not writing to say what I think is right or wrong in what you have done.

Rather, I think I was wrong that day to
actually resort to using powerpoint slides that other people have prepared.
It would not only be unfair to those classes who experienced
first hand the problem,but to others who might not have
learnt anything during the course of the lesson.

However, if I may be allowed to speak of the situation in our team that day-
I am sure you will understand.
Afterall, you are very much more mature than us in such matters
and that you do not exhibit signs of unreasonability in your actions.
I am sure you are the kind of facilitator that does not downgrade
a team for the very sake of downgrading them and dislike of the attitude-
it would, of course, be a very immature thing to do.
And immature is something that I do not think you are.

During the course of that day,
I am certain you have realised that our team had three people.
Vasenth, Vivian and I. Please, before any conclusion is being jumped to,
allow me to shed some light upon the state of which my team-mates were in.
Vivian had high fever and was feeling nauseaous that whole day.
Not to mention that Vasenth is not exactly feeling
in the pink of health either.
Both of them considered returning home during the breaks,
however upon asking of a favour- they remained for your class.

Will you then disagree with me in the fact that I am not a perfect being,
designed to handle all situations? If, by chance,
that you have marked Vivian and Vasenth harshly due to the actions
taken by us that day- I beseech you.
Give them not a "D"- a "C" is understandable
but allow me to bear the brunt of the punishment meted out,
because they were not exactly in their best states at that time.

Pardon me again should I exhibit such behaviour in class,
because I did not think to mention about this to you earlier that day.
And of course, I do not want to walk out of your class-
afterall, enterprise is interesting and
I want to continue increasing my knowledge of it.

Thank you for your kind attention,
Sharene.
w24m.

(P.S:
I know that the marking scheme of G106 has changed-
Jaime explained it to me.
But I do not think that for that reason itself should
the amount of "C"s,"D"s be increased.
Should I have offended you in any way in the course of this email,
I pray that you would find it in your heart to forgive my impudence.
I am unskilled at "people-relations".)

2007-09-26T20:24:00.000+08:00

capoeira just now.
just reached home.
damn tired.
halfway through capoeira, the only thought in my head was
"I'm gonna die. i'm gonna die. I'm gonna die."
the only thought that motivated me was surprisingly-
"I've got RJ! I CANT DIE! yet."

dont ask me why this thought motivated me.

and after i returned home and checked Leo,
guess what?

surprise surprise!
I've got a fucking D for ENTERPRISE.

I'm going to apologise in advance for my crude language
for all your virgin eyes out there, but it's either i rant or i cry-
so shutup and let me rant.

---

Miss Christina Low,
you wrote-

Good effort for participating in class discussions. I understand your personal goals. However, there are better ways of achieving it than what you have done in this session. I have given clear instructions to the class about referring to powerpoint slides and solutions from other classes but you have not heeded my advice.

The purpose of that is so that students are able take a fresh approach towards problem-solving. It is also a channel of self-directed learning for you and your team members to work together. I am sure that you have the ability and the potential to do well, without having to resort to such means. So, just give yourself a chance to solve the solution with your team members and you will appreciate the learning experience better.

(SHARENE: have you opened your fucking minuscule eyes to SEE
the state of our team at that moment in time?
Vivian had fever and was nauseatic that whole point of time
and Vasenth was feeling pretty damn shitty.
And HELLO, there's only 3 PEOPLE
IN OUR TEAM THAT DAY.

For your information, i'm not God!
And if you gave Vivian and Vasenth 'Ds' for their enterprise-
I'll make sure they get As or at least Bs along with me.

fuck you.)

I am sure that you have the ability and the potential to do well, without having to resort to such means. So, just give yourself a chance to solve the solution with your team members and you will appreciate the learning experience better.

(SHARENE : fuck you lah,
you think i'm like God at your class ah.
The whole presentation also depend on me.
Alright, so perhaps i should not use vulgarity on you.

Mayhap it may only exacerbate this situation and,
perpetuate this quagmire as such.
I think that hideous, maundering people like you motivate me
somehow to get up and get even/better.

I will make you acknowledge that i'm this
fantabulous student that you wished you had the favour of.
And i will make sure that I will get As in your class,
no matter who you put me with.

I'll prove you wrong, I'll shoot you down
and then i'll stand you on a fucking pedestal for others to see.

And stop being so fucking unreasonable-
are you in the middle of pre-menopausing or something?

And if you mention that you agreed with my personal goals,
why the living heavens did you give me a fucking D!?
Or maybe you're one of those simpleminded people,
who bullies people for that very reason in itself. Another possibility,
perhaps that's just one of your salient characteristics.

However, dare you take this advantage and take it a deux?
Then aye, earn my respect that you have discarded so early in the semester.
Do not make me walk out of your class while stating that
this class is a totally useless and meaningless class,
due to the very fact that you're facilitating it.

have you never heard of the phrase-
"if you're not helping, you're contributing to the problem?
if you're contributing to the problem-
then get the fuck out of the way."?

How your previous students managed to like you is very much beyond me.
Or maybe perhaps your previous students
are attracted to your recreant nature? )

2007-09-26T10:46:00.000+08:00

I WANT HAVAIANAS!

I WANT TO GO TO BUGIS STREET AGAIN! :D

I WANT TO HANGOUT WITH RACH AGAIN!

i know i really have to research hehe
but--

hahahhaa
well you geddit :P

later gots capoiera! :D
hope it goes well! :):)

2007-09-25T21:39:00.003+08:00

look.
why i'm avoiding you is because
you're TOO enthusiastic about that thing.

in layman's terms, you scared me off.

:/

2007-09-25T20:41:00.000+08:00

TIRED.

all talk no action- what i've seen so often that i'd get sick of it.
not that i'm referring to anyone in general.
just abit crunked at the moment.

specificality? how specific did you want it to be?
i've show you what's specific.

and khabir passed me Joss Stone's album! :D
YEY KHABIR! :D
turns out Alex wasn't that bad too! just that he's abit quiet.. :P
and kokliang's funny! HAHA

about yesterday-
initially was gna go for IG meeting but something popped up.
turns out that while i was waiting for the train to arrive-
I WAS CAUGHT BY ZINING, HER FRIEND,SHIKIN AND JAMES!
AHHHHH!

didnt know how/what to react.
*doink
and they -had- to walk over :X
i'm so deaded man.
and i've really gotta go to the meeting next monday-
or James will suan me till i really cannot tahan D:

---

What did you think about your team's argument today? Be specific.

I think that my team's argument was flawed.
I think that there's much that we are able to
correct and improve from- such as the fact that
change requires time.

If, by chance that i had to redo this problem,
indeed I would support
and agree with the claim.However I would emphasize and
include certain
other ideas into the presentation,
such as the point that even if
humans appreciate the beauty of similarity-
it has not always been this way.

In the course of history, it has been that with
these categorising of similarity and breaking of
similarity- many drastic actions has been taken.
An example of such is of the belief that the
earth is not round, but rather- flat. And to any
who opposed this belief, was the punishment
of being labelled "different" in thinking and to
some in different societies, was death.
Of course not all was treated as such, maybe
some were just ostracised or treated as though
they were mentally ill to have thought in such a
way.

In this example,we are able to notice two points:
1. Death to those who disagreed and broke the
idea of similarity (the belief that the earth was
round rather than flat)
2. A contradiction- "humans appreciate the beauty
of sameness and also breaking of that sameness",
the action of death to those who oppose is in
opposition of this statement.

In my explanation below is how the both of these
points tie in to the claim.

Within humans is an innate fear
of the unknown. What exactly is after death- that
we do not know. For that reason and some others,
some/many of us fear death.
If for any reason, the fear
of these people(who first came up with the idea)
actually overwhelms this desire to prove that the
earth was round- the belief that the earth is flat
would still have stood as credible and plausible.
This is, of course, untrue- that the fear is the
main emotion of such a person. However, we must
still not take lightly that such an 'absurd' idea
(that the earth is round) did infact merit a
punishment like death.

To have such a punishment handed out, the
peoples of that point of time(in a certain society)
must then not have been a very accepting people.
Due to a different thinking of the world being
round, which was to break the similarity of ideas
within that society itself- was death. It was likely
that the peoples, at that point of time, was not
exactly very appreciative of breaking similarity-
an exact contradiction of the claim.

To the second point, is it possible that only
actions that are seen as major/important to
certain people would merit an exaggerated
response? If by chance a person feels threatened,
the person would naturally react to 'defend'
him/her/themselves. So then, moving back to the
example given, if the idea of a round earth didn't
threaten the belief (that is, it didn't break the
similarity of the ideas of the people at that time)
of others (those who thought that the earth is flat)
why then would they hand such a harsh
punishment out?

Then this brings it back to the claim that
"humans appreciate the beauty of sameness and also
breaking of that sameness".
If such ideas does indeed threaten the beliefs of
certain individuals- then won't you agree with me
in saying that these peoples(at that time) certainly
isn't very appreciative of the breaking of that
same belief? So then this claim would be untrue,
because they appreciate the sameness but
not the breaking of the sameness.

Hence, i conclude my RJ stating that I would try
to bring to light the flaws of my team's
presentation if i have to repeat this problem again.
And i would reiterate that this claim is true in
certain situations and untrue in others.

2007-09-25T16:24:00.000+08:00

ARGH

DONT YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT "NO" MEANS!?

go away! >(

2007-09-23T20:30:00.001+08:00

=/
i wont swear (in vain) a vow again.

i dont know what to say.
i say yes, i get it.
i say no, i get it.
i might as well bear it in silence right?

no lah, it's not your fault.
it's MY fault.
MY FAULT.
want to use expletives also dont know want to say
"f*ck you lah" or "f*ck me lah"
if i say f*ck you, i'm wrong.
if i say f*ck me, it sounds wrong.

ARGH!

2007-09-23T19:14:00.000+08:00

the song is stuck in my head
stuck in mich's head too.
O_o

on the other hand...
lol.

---

The Way I Are (Dir...

(Keri)
Baby if you strip, you can get a tip
‘Cause I like you just the way you are
(Timbaland)
I’m about to strip and I’m well equipped
Can you handle me the way I are?
(Keri)
I don’t need the G’s or the car keys
Boy I like you just the way you are
(Keri & Timbaland)
Let me see ya strip, you can get a tip
‘Cause I like, I like, I like….

2007-09-23T09:34:00.001+08:00

oompa loompa songs stuck in my head.

i want to sleep.

a big bug appeared in my bathroom
just after i finished bathing last night.
yucks man :(

tis a nice weather this morn :)

---
sunday mornin' rain is fallin'! :D
<3

---
oompa loompa doompeddi-da!
if you're not greedy you will go far-

2007-09-22T20:14:00.000+08:00

united 300

damn warm and uncomfortable x.x
darn uncomfortable.

went for IG meeting today instead of DG,
was weighing what's more impt late last night: them vs me.
missed DG, hope i did the right thing.

expiring from heat stroke.

ugh

2007-09-21T19:57:00.001+08:00

Miss Christina,
I'm honest.
I do not like you.

2007-09-20T17:47:00.000+08:00

:) i'ma happy girl
today went well.
our team was super productive! :D
miss vicky is super pretty and fun!
:D

jon gave me a ride while lecturing me
abt releasing details abit earlier.
that's his ulterior motive la.
ahahaha
(i was joking,pruneee)
hehe

jellyfish!! :P

2007-09-19T18:22:00.000+08:00

i know that no two people can fully understand each other.
i know that no two people experiences what we have gone
through in totally the same manner.
i understand that you everyone wont agree with you totally-
much less people who dislike you.

now, appearances can be deceiving.
impressions may deceive as well.

who knows?
the person next to you may have a facade that's able to seem
real in itself, the person next to you might have been mistreated
at home, heck, the person next to you may have had his/her
parents 'removed' from them at a young age.

now tell me-
does it seem that life is unfair to them?
they seem pitiful, dont they?
thing is, most of them pick themselves up and move on-
life doesnt end that way.
aye, it isn't the end, only the beginning.

people get stronger and remember the pain, the incidences-
and henceforth try to prevent the same thing from having a
repetition of itself.

i'm not saying anyone in particular,
just some thoughts along the way home.

---

i can feel my attitude changing, parts of it reverting back to it's original state.
If you know me better, my 'inner demon' is destruction in itself.
the 'bloodthirstiness' is returning- little by little; inch by inch.
it's like an insatiable thirst that cannot be quenched.
heh.

or mayhap it's time for me to cut my hair again,
my attitude gets out of hand when it's longer than it should be.
pardon me if i'm this bitchy snit if/when i'm out with any of you.

---

i'm highly dissatisfied with my grades.
i'm disappointed in myself and i'm furious that i can even get that
low in my grades.
i will get better.
scratch that.
i will excel!

2007-09-18T20:03:00.000+08:00

Tsk tsk.
Sharene, Sharene,
you're getting soft now.

eugh.
my attitude and my outlook's changing.
i can feel it, no need to mention thinking.
my dont-know-dont-care attitude's changing,
and i hope that not much crap will come my way.

tired.
but a super hot bath is t3h sh1tz~!
i'ma become a piece of jelly if a
super hot bath awaits me at the end of everyday :D
yeah, i'm like this bath freak.

saw sam, hani,rudy at the stage area in the morn.
met up with meijin,xiboon and saw dei with dimi.
xiwen joined us aftwards.
(xiwen is also in w1 :D)
and as i was walking out to find meijin-
I SAW GILLIAN!
we're in the same block- ohmygosh!
and aft sch, when Ivan and i were walking over to w14A-
i met rudy! talk about coincidence huh O.o

2007-09-17T19:19:00.000+08:00

thus commences my first day back at school-
and in my new class with MATH.

ended quite well actually.

i had this mindset long ago when i was knee-high,
if u can wear your hair in a center parting and look good-
u can look good in ANY parting.

serious!

2007-09-16T18:26:00.000+08:00

dave chappelle: good to come home

hehehehe

2007-09-16T14:43:00.000+08:00

:D:D:D

i was so crunked this week,
and what's worse is i dont know why i was crunked.

after returning home from church,
i realised that i felt very very carefree.
like my burdens were lifted from me or something..
REALLY i'm serious, for the past few days i was grumpy like jon on crack :P
(no i was jk, jon!)
HEE!

i still dont feel like going back to sch leh,
but whatever right?
:)

let go and let God, i should! :D

it's a time to stop looking and waiting,
but a time to take action :)

---
this song is passed to me by linxin!<33
whom si en passed it to :P
and this song really touched me
cause i didnt think of it that way,
since God is so good- why all the chaos and calamities?
if God is so good- why all the problems and hurtful situations in our lives?

"Trust His Heart" by Babbie Mason

Trust His Heart.mp...

All things work for our good
though sometimes we can't see how they could
struggles that break our hearts in two
sometimes blinds us to the truth

Our Father knows what's best for us
His ways are not our own
So when your pathway grows dim, and you just can't see Him
Remember you're never alone

God is too wise to be mistaken
God is too good to be unkind
So when you don't understand
When you don't see His plan
When you can't trace His hand
Trust His heart

He sees the master plan
And He holds our future in His hands
So don't live as those who have no hope
All our hope is found in Him

We see the present clearly
But He sees the first and the last
And like a tapestry He's weaving you and me to someday be just like Him

God is too wise to be mistaken
God is too good to be unkind
So when you don't understand
When you don't see His plan
When you can't trace His hand
Trust His heart

He alone is faithful and true
He alone knows what is best for you
So when you don't understand
When you don't see His plan
When you can't trace His hand trust His heart

2007-09-15T19:37:00.000+08:00

i think falloutboy is freak'n awesome.
i think i should stop getting sick.
i think my mind's full of lyrics that keep replaying themselves.
i think i should stop having lyrics replaying themselves in my mind.
i think i should listen to something else.
i think i should stop thinking.

"Who do you think you are?" by Spice Girls

(Spice Girls) Who ...

The race is on to get out of the bottom,
The top is high so your roots are forgotten,
Giving is good as long as you're getting,
What's driving you it's ambition and betting,
I said who do you think you are?
(I said who)
Some kind of superstar,
You have got to swing it, shake it, move it, make it,
Who do you think you are?
Trust it, use it, prove it, groove it,
Show me how good you are,
Swing it, shake it, move it, make it,
Who do you think you are?
Trust it, use it, prove it, groove it,
Show me how good you are

You're swelling out in the wrong direction,
You've got the bug, superstar you've been bitten,
Your trumpet's blowing for far too long,
Playing the snake of the ladder, but you're wrong

I said who do you think you are?
(I said who)
Some kind of superstar,
You have got to swing it, shake it, move it, make it,
Who do you think you are?
Trust it, use it, prove it, groove it,
Show me how good you are,
Swing it, shake it, move it, make it,
Who do you think you are?
Trust it, use it, prove it, groove it,
Show me how good you are

You have got to reach on up, never lose your soul,
You have got to reach on up, never lose control

I said who do you think you are?
(I said who)
Some kind of superstar,
You have got to swing it, shake it, move it, make it,
Who do you think you are?
Trust it, use it, prove it, groove it,
Show me how good you are,
Swing it, shake it, move it, make it,
Who do you think you are?
Trust it, use it, prove it, groove it,
Show me how good you are

Swing it, shake it, move it, make it,
(who do you think you are?)
Trust it, use it, prove it, groove it
Show me how good you are

2007-09-14T09:47:00.000+08:00

i dont believe it!
i just dont believe it! D:

HOW CAN ANYONE NOT HAVE HEARD OF THIS SONG,
OF ALL OF FALL OUT BOY'S GREATEST HITS?!\

Dance, Dance.mp3

"Dance,dance"
by Fall Out Boy

She says she's no good with words but I'm worse
Barely stuttered out
"A joke of a romantic" or stuck to my tongue
Weighed down with words too over-dramatic
Tonight it's "it can't get much worse"
Vs. "no one should ever feel like.."

I'm two quarters and a heart down
And I don't want to forget how your voice sounds
These words are all I have so I'll write them
So you need them just to get by

[Whispered:] We're going into D-Minor

Dance, Dance
We're falling apart to half time
Dance, Dance
And these are the lives you'd love to lead
Dance, this is the way they'd love
If they knew how misery loved me

You always fold just before you're found out
Drink up its last call
Last resort
But only the first mistake and I...

I'm two quarters and a heart down
And I don't want to forget how your voice sounds
These words are all I have so I'll write them
So you need them just to get by

Why don't you show me the little bit of spine
You've been saving for his mattress, love

Dance, Dance
We're falling apart to half time
Dance, Dance
And these are the lives you'd love to lead
Dance, this is the way they'd love
If they knew how misery loved me

Why don't you show me the little bit of spine
You've been saving for his mattress (mattress, mattress)
I only want sympathy in the form of you crawling into bed with me

Dance, Dance
We're falling apart to half time
Dance, Dance
And these are the lives you'd love to lead

Dance this is the way they'd love (way they'd love)
Dance this is the way they'd love (way they'd love)
Dance this is the way they'd love
If they knew how misery loved me

Dance, Dance
Dance, Dance
Dance, Dance
Dance, Dance

2007-09-13T17:55:00.002+08:00

not shooting anyone with my previous post.
it's just my opinion after so many years of seeing
people belittle and pity themselves =/

2007-09-13T08:33:00.001+08:00

i'm going to address some issues today.

firstly, MSN IS NOT GOING TO START CHARGING PEOPLE MONEY.

THOUSANDS FALL FOR HOTMAIL PRANK

"Take this story: "MSN 'to charge user fee'" says the headline, and for a few weeks it has steadily moved up the ranks of our daily statistics. On Sunday it was the most-read business story, and on Monday and Tuesday it featured in the top five. The hitch: It was written five years ago - on 25 February 2001."
-Tim Weber
Business editor, BBC News website.

okay? if you can't read it,just click on the link and read the story lah.
omgosh, silly people.
anyways, i have gmail as backup incase something like this happens.
LOL.

Next, to the people who think life isn't fair,
let me tell you this- LIFE NEVER WAS FAIR.
deal with it.
and dont start telling me "but i didnt do anything to deserve it!"
so?
the people who died in Sept 11's terrorist attack-
did they deserve it?
the people who died in the tsunami-
did they deserve it?

look, at least you're alive.
you're breathing,you still have all your limbs,
you're not in a slave trade or anything- and you're complaining!?
if you can't deal with things now
(when you're so young and probably still schooling),
you might as well forget about going into the world to work.
the world doesnt revolve around you.

deal with it.
i know i'm being blunt here, but it's SICK.
SICK when people already leaving their teenage years start behaving
like children who are still in primary school.
don't like the situation?dont like what's happening?
then DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.

if not, then just shutup and hold your peace.

and finally,
caught No Reservations yesterday.
abit of a sappy movie though, eh it's a 'couple movie'.
if you get what i mean *snicker
the only actress that caught my eye was Catherine Zeta-Jones.
darn pretty leh, my gosh!
not pretty per se, more like beautiful haha
and the guy,Nick(Aaron Eckhart),
is super rubbishy in the first part of the movie.
LOL

2007-09-11T08:35:00.000+08:00

Job

Chapter 3:
20 Wherefore is light given to him that is in misery,
and life unto the bitter in soul;
21 which long for death, but it cometh not;
and dig for it more than for hid treasures;
22 which rejoice exceedingly, and are glad,
when they can find the grave?
23 Why is light given to a man whose way is hid,
and whom God hath hedged in?
24 For my sighing cometh before I eat,
and my roarings are poured out like the waters.
25 For the thing which I greatly feared is come upon me,
and that which I was afraid of is come unto me.
26 I was not in safety, neither had I rest,
neither was I quiet; yet trouble came.

Chapter 37:
Eli'hu extols God
4 After it a voice roareth:
he thundereth with the voice of his excellency;
and he will not stay them
when his voice is heard.
5 God thundereth marvelously with his voice;
great things doeth he, which we cannot comprehend.
6 For he saith to the snow, Be thou on the earth;
likewise to the small rain,
and to the great rain of his strength.

12 and it is turned round about by his counsels:
that they may do whatsoever he commandeth them
upon the face of the world in the earth.
13 He causeth it to come, whether for correction,
or for his land, or for mercy.
14 Hearken unto this, O Job:
stand still, and consider the wondrous works of God.
15 Dost thou know when God disposed them,
and caused the light of his cloud to shine?
16 Dost thou know the balancings of the clouds,
the wondrous works of him which is perfect in knowledge?
17 how thy garments are warm,
when he quieteth the earth by the south wind?

---

tbh,for many years,
i've not finished the story of Job.
firstly, the paragraphs are LONG and many parts are BORING.
secondly, it's so depressing-
the dialogues between Job and 4 others- his three friends and Eli'hu.

For some reason,
i was determined to finish th book of Job last night-
and i did! (finish reading the book, i mean)
then again, 36 out of the 42 chapters were depressing.
lol, seems darn familiar somehow.
the situation Job is in, that is.

2007-09-10T17:13:00.000+08:00

STICKMAN: mighty to save!

a love that's never failing

Everyone needs compassion
Love that’s never failing
Let mercy fall on me
Everyone needs forgiveness
The kindness of a Saviour
The hope of nations

Saviour
He can move the mountains
My God is mighty to save
He is mighty to save
Forever
Author of salvation
He rose and conquered the grave
Jesus conquered the grave

So take me as You find me
All my fears and failures
Fill my life again
I give my life to follow
Everything I believe in
Now I surrender

Shine Your light and let the whole world see
We’re singing
For the glory of the risen King

2007-09-10T12:27:00.000+08:00

I MISS JAIME!
:(:(:(:(

AHHHHHHHH CRUNK IT! :(

2007-09-10T12:04:00.000+08:00

the first thing i checked when i came online
was LEO- the module one lah.
anw, imagine me stunned and sitting infront
of my posting/reshuffling results! D:

i'm in w24m!
day1: COMPUTING
day2: PROBSOLVING
day8: BASIC SCI
day4: CULTURE AND AESTATICS
day5: ENTERPRISE

save me from terror unexperienced! D:
computing is on day 1!!!
which is MONDAY!
argh!

2007-09-07T19:56:00.000+08:00

did a few quizzes.
was bored-
what do you expect?

Your Brain's Pattern

Your mind is a creative hotbed of artistic talent.
You're always making pictures in your mind, especially when you're bored.
You are easily inspired to think colorful, interesting thoughts.
And although it may be hard to express these thoughts, it won't always be.

What Pattern Is Your Brain?

You Are a Auditory Learner

You tend to remember what you hear, and you have a knack for speaking well.
You excel at debating, foreign languages, and music.
You would be an excellent diplomat - or rock star!

What's Your Learning Style?

You Are a Caramel Crunch Donut

You're a complex creature, and you're guilty of complicating things for fun.
You've been known to sit around pondering the meaning of life...
Or at times, pondering the meaning of your doughnut.
To frost or not to frost? To fill or not to fill? These are your eternal questions.

What Donut Are You?

2007-09-05T13:43:00.001+08:00

everytime i hear that song "God will make a way"
it breaks my heart but fills me with hope.
sounds contradicting?

well, i dunno..
sometimes i just fear that i will hear this song,
because then it just reminds me that not everything
goes according to our wishes.

that sometimes simple faith is all that's needed.

2007-09-03T18:42:00.000+08:00

shall do a lil something i found on ivan's blog-

List out the top 5 presents you wish for:
i have no material needs that's currently
so urgent that i cant live without.i have wants but wishes? not really i suppose..
The person who tagged you is: Ivan
Your relationship with him/her is: :D
Your 5 impressions of him/her:
-Thoughtful
-Sensitive
-Blur
-Amusing
-Quiet

The most memorable thing he/she had done for you:
talked about some problems that occurred at that point of time
The most memorable words he/she had said to you:
"you always bully me de!"
If he/ she becomes your lover, you will:
er? i'm an impromptu person,i'll think about it when the time comes. :)
If he/ she becomes your lover, things he/ she has to improve on will be:
Sleep at human-hours please,
it's hard to synchronise time when you're a mosquito :P
If he/ she becomes your enemy, the reason will be:
i dont take enemies, i dislike yes. but no enemies. :)
The most desired thing you want to do for him/ her now is:
Get him to rest so that he can recover.
Your overall impression of him/ her is:
A highly amusing individual that seems
to be bullied rather regularly by me.
How do you think people around you will feel about you:
How'd I know?I dont think.
The characteristic (s) you love of yourself is /are:
i'm random, and i love that i love caramel macchiato.<3
On the contrary. the characteristic (s) you hate of yourself is/ are:
I dont hate, as i say- i dislike. I may dislike intensely but not hate.
I intensely dislike that i dislike insects.
The most ideal person you want to be is:
Sharene! now that's an ideal person right there.
For people that care and like you, say something to them:
hee<3
Pass this quiz to 10 people that you wish to know how they feel about you:
i wont pass this on, but i'll leave the thingie here though.

2007-09-03T15:36:00.000+08:00

[EDITED]
i want coffee.
blah.

updated the links.
did up the profile part-
my description may now be longer than the summarized portion.

my head hurts :(
i cant remember what i was thinking about awhile ago,
i think i'm growing old?

black comedies! :D

i want to go for this year's WOW camp!
i think it's 5-7 Dec or something..
i want to go for the payakkapum, NE Thailand, mission trip too!
it's at 10-17 Dec!

not certain if i can though :(((
pfft.

--

wanted a new layout yesterday.
was surfing around websites
and was hence inspired by magnette's simple style.

:)

2007-09-02T21:22:00.000+08:00

<3

YEY! new layout!
<3<3
<3

tired now, more tmr. hee

2007-09-02T16:35:00.000+08:00

I WANT A NEW LAYOUT!

I. DONT. CARE!

2007-09-02T14:58:00.000+08:00

April* - Daisy

Daisy — People look up to you and you love attention.
You can also be REALLY lazy and love nothing better than good old lie-in!
You’re creative and passionate in everything you do.
You can also be gullible.

from here.

right.
lawl.

When NASA first started sending up astronauts,
they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity.
To combat the problem,
NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity,
upside down, underwater,
on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures
ranging from below freezing to 300 C.
- The Russians used a pencil.

2007-09-02T14:14:00.000+08:00

it's darn discouraging.
broke down in church today while talking to linxin.
the problem seemed to have gotten worse in some ways,
but at least they havent gotten very much worse.

to be honest, i dont know what to do.

how long more must this go on?
another 10 years?
when will they finally stop being so narrow-minded?
how long must this burden be carried?
why?

it's discouraging, almost to the point of despair.
yet there's nothing that i can do.

what can i do about this?

2007-09-01T10:46:00.000+08:00

lawl.
nearly had another disagreement with my father last night.
whatever.

anyway, this morning i went to look
for the illegal downloading news thing:
turns out Odex wasn't as famous as it portrays itself.
pitiful idiots.

Odex is the subdistributor with (pardon my language) shit subtitles
and the motive to earn fast money. amusing.
to be honest, i didnt expect them to be a subdistributor-
i thought they were some government company.
ODEX OFFICIAL WEBSITE
turns out they were not.
they're a private company!?!?!?!?!?!

Odex's actions against file sharing.

Odex vs Pacific Internet.

Odex's controversy-
turns out that it's not without flaws too!

by reading these articles:
- channel news asia
#01
#02

after reading #01, i laughed my bum off for about an hour.
(sisters looked at me like i was crazy)
after reading #02, i felt that if they wanted to 'enforce' -
there are better ways to do so.

"This exercise was never meant to be just an enforcement.
It's not a profiteering mission to get as much money from everybody."
- Director, Odex Pte Ltd.

make the connection.
Odex wants to make fast money-
they purchase cheap translations from hongkong with rubbish subs
they change the subs into even worse subs that make practically no sense
thereby changing the total plot/concept of the anime itself.

in taking this route of 'enforcing anti-piracy',
they send out letters demanding money or action will be taken against them.
(truism, who in singapore wants to have a criminal record?
when they can pay the 'fine'?)
this sounds like extortionist to me.

anyway, of course people will give them some
S$3,000-5,000 to prevent having action taken.
thing is, Odex didnt expect Pacific Internet to bring them to court.

now, IF no one prevents this action from being taken-
anime distributors/& sub-distributors will be highly popular in singapore.
(or so they think, due to anime being sought after)

since their company is the one against illegal downloading,
people will assume that if registered with this company-
they will naturally be 'safe' from paying some S$3k+ fine.

so more people will definitely register with them,
and pay much money for low quality anime that
originates from pirated episodes from Hong Kong.

I for one, will take Pacific Internet as my role model-
maybe tell my grandchildren of the future to not be intimidated by
people, even if they seem to have all the "balls in their court", so to speak.

to put it in singaporean words-
"eh please! they have only this gundam seed thing that is OWNED EXCLUSIVELY.
ONE anime only lor, still want to talk big. "

rofl.
it's so funny that i forgot to laugh.

2007-08-31T19:25:00.000+08:00

i'm frustrated.
verily so.

and i can see an argument between my dad and i
occurring somewhen tonight/soon.

breathe sharene, you can do this.
breathe

2007-08-31T13:21:00.000+08:00

okay-
last night was crunked.
seriously.
i didnt want to talk about the disagreement between my parents and i,
which invariably led to my insulting of jon the next day.
didnt want to think about that oath.

jon tried to talk to me about it last night,
and i think i accidentally insulted him again.
*sigh
i'm thankful, really.
that so many people around me care.

and i think i owe it to jon for putting up with my rubbish.
so jon, if you're reading this:

i'm darn sorry i insulted you,
no excuses given and no blames to avert responsibility.

anyway, stayed up till 1.30plus am last night to chat with ivan :)
and then i conked out.

met up with the sec sch classmates at 8am?
(was supposed to wake up at 6! :( )
was nearly late :X

for some reason, when returning to zss-
(rembr they're like crap-scary.)
i wasn't scared of Sng and Ranjit anymore.
REALLY! >(

i'm sure ranjit singh was like 'wth?' in his mind
when he asked me "are you smiling?"
yeah, i was grinning.
no idea why though, no i'm not sot.

anw, moving on-
was initially thinking of hanging out with xavier and friends,
budden during lunch i really wanted to conk off at the table.
so i went home to sleeeeep! :D

2007-08-30T12:38:00.000+08:00

something i did last night before sleeping at the desk.
<3 didnt do a wallpaper for idk how long alr.

phoo~

---

small wonder jon's always grumpy!
he doesnt like fruits-
well, happyfruits that is! :P

http://www.13.waisays.com/

2007-08-30T10:28:00.000+08:00

okayyyyy!
sharene's been offline for dunno how long :D

been digging ard the house, found a carem board! :P
didnt know we have that, RIGHTOo

---

"Dum Diddly" by Black Eyed Peas

You know the music make you jump and prance
The BE Peas we keep you rocking on the dance
You know my music make 'em jump and prance
Dum diddley dum dum diddley dum dum diddley dum dum diddley diddley
[2x]

Bring on the rhythm; bring on the drums
The rim shot sound like someone gunned
(Pop! Pop!) There go your ear drums
So raise the volume to the maximum
Base booming bout to make your body feel numb
Pulsations probably penetrate your skeleton
This little diddley definitely demonstrates some
Dum diddley dum - so dance to the drum

[Chorus]
Don't hurt yourself, take it easy
There's no better time than right now
So let yourself go, o-eh-o
Watch yourself now, her comes the sound
[2x]
You know the music make 'em jump and prance
The BE Peas we keep you rocking on the dance
You know my music make 'em jump and prance
Dum diddley dum dum diddley dum dum diddley dum dum diddley diddley
[2x]

Freeze
Music please
Apparently yeah we the true MC's
BE Boys no decoys you know the sting
BE Peas till infinity
And we officially also fresh in the scene
So tell me if you see a crew that officially
Hit the whole glow simultaneously
Hit after hit, check out my melody

[Chorus]

Sim sim sim, blum blum blum
The Black Eyed Peas begun with action
Repeating rhy-rhythm in satisfaction
No need for asking, that's what's happening
The blip blip blip, the blah blah blau
You didn't know me then and you'll never know me now
I'm the Apl.De.Ap, the Filipino Ap
If you need to know my style, yeah let me show you how, come on

[Chorus]

2007-08-28T10:19:00.000+08:00

the more i understand the less i know.

how true this statement speaks of how i feel.
sigh-

i promised jaime that i wldn't vow/swear.
yippee, i just broke it last night.
great, now i'm accountable to some
pretty darn impt people in my life.

Blah man, BLAH.

and it's raining now,super heavy infact-
really dont feel like going all the way to cwp,
can we just go to JP or sth? :(

2007-08-26T14:09:00.000+08:00

was reading xiaxue's blog-
(dont say "HAHH?! Sharene also reads that?!")

the western world isn't as glammed as it seems on tv.
so what else do they have,
eh minus tall people and guys with super-hairy chests, that is.
okay, an increased number of attractive guys >.>

---
Okay, so zac efron (however the hell you spell that) is cute in HSM.
but he looks gay in hairspray.

at least,that's my opinion la horr-
if you wanna talk abt how cute he is,
might as well talk abt the cute guys in RP or something. O_o

my phone is low on battery!
it dieded on me this morning! D:
boooo-

2007-08-25T21:39:00.000+08:00

Ghost Rider is coolio
no matter how many times i watch it :)

<3

2007-08-25T20:07:00.000+08:00

to accept the situations.
to adapt to become better,
to take a stand when you're stronger.

fever is bad.
dont get it.
ugh

:)

2007-08-24T17:36:00.000+08:00

went out to the library at first-
or so i thought.
that was the plan initially though

to mug,
for luna to mug i mean.

then luna wasn't feeling well,
luna had fever.
and rene was sleepless + appetite-less.
yippee.

so wokey, luna blanjah-ed me to lunch at Jack's.
okay lah, so i didnt ve much appetite
but was strange, the food disappeared while we were talking.
o_O

then again, i can always talk to luna abt stuff-
at least until luna goes overseas to study ._.

feeling better now :)
thanks lunaaaa,
not as bad as i was just now.

2007-08-24T09:47:00.001+08:00

"constricting heart"
something people usually write in passages.
so why is it that my heart has been constricting
ever since i woke up this morning?

tbh, i had alot of fun yesterday.
i'll miss w35n, that's for sure.
of course, certain people more than others.

let me summarize it briefly-
school.
fun classtime.
met mentor.
class ended.

meijin and i-
bank.
met up with jeremy,shawn,marie and jeffery.

went towards vivo-
met up with kenny, ronald,melvyn.
alvin came later when we were mekaning at the food republic.
the noodles that i had was bleagh :(
CANDY EMPIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
all throughout dinner i was bugging meijin to go Candy Empire
hehehe, she nearly went bonkers :P
got my jellybeaaaaans :)

then we went to get the tickets,
was some sort of dilema in the beginning.
but then, it worked out well!! :D
Hairspray-
not something that i think is super nice, nor super funny.
it's just a regular humor film.
we went to take photos after that.
took lots and lots and lots. :DDDD
and we laughed and laughed and laughed.

._.

i should be happy-
sem 1 ended with a bang.(not literally)
so why am i shtumped?
why am i sad..? and is this disappointment?

hard to identify feelings atm,
it's so confusing when they're mixed up.
pfft. chicken backside ._.
no appetite these days-
no idea why.
and dont ask me if i'm dieting-
HELL NO, i'm not that crazy.
just no appetite-
i mean, the fridge is filled with yummy food-
but i just gots no appetite.
and i'm darn tired, but i cant sleep.
maybe i'm getting sick?
then again, i'm super lethargic when i'm sick.
but i cant sleep.

sigh..

this song keeps resounding in my head-
and dont say "SHARENE! why're you listening to THIS song?!"
tbh, it got STUCK in my heard la ._.
chicken backside :(

"coast to coast" by Westlife.

an empty street, an empty house
a hole inside my heart
all along the rooms are getting smaller
i wonder how i wonder why i wonder where they are
the days we had the songs we sang together
i know my love im holding on forever
to the love that seems faraway
to find a place i love the most
so i say a little prayer and hope my dreams will take me there
where the skies are blue to see you once again my love
over seas from coast to coast to find the place i love the most
where the fields are green to see you once again my love
i try to read i go work
laughing in my face
but i cant seem to keep a simple thinkin
oh no
i know my love im holdin on forever
to the love that seems faraway
so i say a little prayer and hope my dreams will take me there
wher the fields are green see
you once again my love

to hold you in my arms to promise you my love
to tell you form the heart what
im thinkin of..

so i
say a little prayer and hope my dreams will take me there
where the skies are blue see you once again my love

2007-08-23T09:39:00.001+08:00

dunno what's wrong with blogger >.>
cldnt change my blog entry :X

ladidum, wanna sleep ._.
PUFF WAN SLEEP

met the mentor just now,
eh- Tham Kah Weng if i remembered correctly :P

PUFF WAN SLEEP
SLEEPPP ._.

2007-08-22T21:01:00.000+08:00

CRY ON MY SHOULDER

(Deutsch. Sucht Den Super.)

If the hero never comes to you
If you need someone you're feeling blue
If you're away from love and you're alone
If you call your friends and nobody's home
You can run away but you can't hide
Through a storm and through a lonely night
Then I show you there's a destiny
The best things in life
They're free

[Chorus]
But if you wanna cry
Cry on my shoulder
If you need someone who cares for you
If you're feeling sad your heart gets colder
Yes I show you what real love can do

If your sky is grey oh let me know
There's a place in heaven where we'll go
If heaven is a million years away
Oh just call me and I make your day
When the nights are getting cold and blue
When the days are getting hard for you
I will always stay here by your side
I promise you I'll never hide

---

had some coffee at home before rushing down,
no idea why i'm later than usual today.
super duper tired.
darn tired man.

no appetite today,
even though i went to meet xiian just now.
just had super sweet coffee.
met up with peiling just now to get two gifts and a card-
dropped by bpp just now and showed her a shortcut.
HAHA, and WHO said she'll get lost when
she's directed to a route by me?!
HUH?! D:<

as i was saying to peiling just now,
was hungry but no appetite.
no idea why though..?
crunked man.

guess i'm going to miss this class..
last day of the Sem tmr,
rewind time and freeze it there.
then again,that's only in fiction stories-
not real life.

fuck this.
am i whining?

But if you wanna cry
Cry on my shoulder

2007-08-22T13:52:00.000+08:00

puff not angry!
puff not grumpy!
puff not sad!

PUFF WAN SLEEP!

tbh, idk why i want to sleep so much.
super tired ._.
and today's problem is fun!

but i prefer markers,pencils and colour-pencils
over oil pastels and crayons.
my forte is in shading,sketching-
not using pastels ._.

i really want to sleep..

PUFF WAN SLEEP!! :(

---

went down to find junxian at first break.
suddenly call me to meet him >_>
thought was some SAS thing,
but was not.
hhas, kena bullied by me :P

PUFF REALLY WANNA SLEEP :(:(

2007-08-20T17:20:00.000+08:00

You ask me why-
Why I’m so different.
Why I’m not the same as everybody else
Well something changed- It just happened
When I opened up my heart and let Him in
Jesus came in he came into my life
And i know i never felt so good.

You ask me how- How I can be sure.
How I know it’s not just something else for fun
Cause He’s so real- So real in my life.
He picked me up and turned my universe around.

---

hitched a ride from Peter just now :D
didnt see him in a loooooooooooooooong time,
infact, i think the last time was at JCC?
anw, was super tired just now.
nearly slept in his car. HAHA :X
scully he leave me in the middle of the highway ah!
D:

sighaye, wanna snooze-
but i dont want the sem to end so quickly.
:(

okay lah, so maybe it's a mixed emotion-
i want the hols to come, but i dont want the sem to end.
makes sense? hhas.

i want free time, but i want to go school too.
i want to play, but i want to learn and study too.
i like it that Chem's easy(for me), but i dont like physics-
cause it's boring.
thank heavens that i'm not in any physics-based course!
i'll just die there can? :(

watched 881 yesterday, attractive main characters,
touching ending- but the plotline was in overall,
rather corny. >.>
tell me why i wasted 10 bucks to watch a corny drama?

i ve a list of what movies i wanna watch alr! :D
puff wan watch-
~ratatouille!
~no reservations!
~EVAN ALMIGHTY! :D:D:D
~poltergay!
~perfect stranger!

yeah, if only i had 32 hours in a day. :(
puff wan sleep! :D

scary

2007-08-19T09:59:00.000+08:00

after last night, i felt that things were getting crunky.
way crunky.

jon passed me these verses, they are ~~scary~~freaky:
Revelation 12-18
it shook me.
serious, when i read it-
i was worse than scared.
i was terrified.

i didn't know what to make of it.
i ve included Rev 17-19 here.
its long, but the parables that it speaks of.
speak of what is to come.

the parables are representatives of characters.
i cant say who is what because im not wise enough.
God hasnt yet opened my eyes.

i didnt jump to conclusions! honest!
just that when i read it, not yet thought about it-
a chill ran up my spine.

Revelation 17

The Woman and the Beast

1One of the seven angels who had the seven bowls came and said to me, "Come, I will show you the punishment of the great prostitute, who sits on many waters. 2With her the kings of the earth committed adultery and the inhabitants of the earth were intoxicated with the wine of her adulteries."

3Then the angel carried me away in the Spirit into a desert. There I saw a woman sitting on a scarlet beast that was covered with blasphemous names and had seven heads and ten horns. 4The woman was dressed in purple and scarlet, and was glittering with gold, precious stones and pearls. She held a golden cup in her hand, filled with abominable things and the filth of her adulteries. 5This title was written on her forehead:
MYSTERY
BABYLON THE GREAT
THE MOTHER OF PROSTITUTES
AND OF THE ABOMINATIONS OF THE EARTH. 6I saw that the woman was drunk with the blood of the saints, the blood of those who bore testimony to Jesus.

When I saw her, I was greatly astonished. 7Then the angel said to me: "Why are you astonished? I will explain to you the mystery of the woman and of the beast she rides, which has the seven heads and ten horns. 8The beast, which you saw, once was, now is not, and will come up out of the Abyss and go to his destruction. The inhabitants of the earth whose names have not been written in the book of life from the creation of the world will be astonished when they see the beast, because he once was, now is not, and yet will come.

9"This calls for a mind with wisdom. The seven heads are seven hills on which the woman sits. 10They are also seven kings. Five have fallen, one is, the other has not yet come; but when he does come, he must remain for a little while. 11The beast who once was, and now is not, is an eighth king. He belongs to the seven and is going to his destruction.

12"The ten horns you saw are ten kings who have not yet received a kingdom, but who for one hour will receive authority as kings along with the beast. 13They have one purpose and will give their power and authority to the beast. 14They will make war against the Lamb, but the Lamb will overcome them because he is Lord of lords and King of kings—and with him will be his called, chosen and faithful followers."

15Then the angel said to me, "The waters you saw, where the prostitute sits, are peoples, multitudes, nations and languages. 16The beast and the ten horns you saw will hate the prostitute. They will bring her to ruin and leave her naked; they will eat her flesh and burn her with fire. 17For God has put it into their hearts to accomplish his purpose by agreeing to give the beast their power to rule, until God's words are fulfilled. 18The woman you saw is the great city that rules over the kings of the earth."

Revelation 18

1After this I saw another angel coming down from heaven. He had great authority, and the earth was illuminated by his splendor. 2With a mighty voice he shouted:
"Fallen! Fallen is Babylon the Great!
She has become a home for demons
and a haunt for every evil spirit,
a haunt for every unclean and detestable bird.
3For all the nations have drunk
the maddening wine of her adulteries.
The kings of the earth committed adultery with her,
and the merchants of the earth grew rich from her excessive luxuries."

4Then I heard another voice from heaven say:
"Come out of her, my people,
so that you will not share in her sins,
so that you will not receive any of her plagues;
5for her sins are piled up to heaven,
and God has remembered her crimes.
6Give back to her as she has given;
pay her back double for what she has done.
Mix her a double portion from her own cup.
7Give her as much torture and grief
as the glory and luxury she gave herself.
In her heart she boasts,
'I sit as queen; I am not a widow,
and I will never mourn.'
8Therefore in one day her plagues will overtake her:
death, mourning and famine.
She will be consumed by fire,
for mighty is the Lord God who judges her.

9"When the kings of the earth who committed adultery with her and shared her luxury see the smoke of her burning, they will weep and mourn over her. 10Terrified at her torment, they will stand far off and cry:
" 'Woe! Woe, O great city,
O Babylon, city of power!
In one hour your doom has come!'

11"The merchants of the earth will weep and mourn over her because no one buys their cargoes any more— 12cargoes of gold, silver, precious stones and pearls; fine linen, purple, silk and scarlet cloth; every sort of citron wood, and articles of every kind made of ivory, costly wood, bronze, iron and marble; 13cargoes of cinnamon and spice, of incense, myrrh and frankincense, of wine and olive oil, of fine flour and wheat; cattle and sheep; horses and carriages; and bodies and souls of men.

14"They will say, 'The fruit you longed for is gone from you. All your riches and splendor have vanished, never to be recovered.' 15The merchants who sold these things and gained their wealth from her will stand far off, terrified at her torment. They will weep and mourn 16and cry out:
" 'Woe! Woe, O great city,
dressed in fine linen, purple and scarlet,
and glittering with gold, precious stones and pearls!
17In one hour such great wealth has been brought to ruin!'

"Every sea captain, and all who travel by ship, the sailors, and all who earn their living from the sea, will stand far off. 18When they see the smoke of her burning, they will exclaim, 'Was there ever a city like this great city?' 19They will throw dust on their heads, and with weeping and mourning cry out:
" 'Woe! Woe, O great city,
where all who had ships on the sea
became rich through her wealth!
In one hour she has been brought to ruin!
20Rejoice over her, O heaven!
Rejoice, saints and apostles and prophets!
God has judged her for the way she treated you.' "

21Then a mighty angel picked up a boulder the size of a large millstone and threw it into the sea, and said:
"With such violence
the great city of Babylon will be thrown down,
never to be found again.
22The music of harpists and musicians, flute players and trumpeters,
will never be heard in you again.
No workman of any trade
will ever be found in you again.
The sound of a millstone
will never be heard in you again.
23The light of a lamp will never shine in you again.
The voice of bridegroom and bride
will never be heard in you again.
Your merchants were the world's great men.
By your magic spell all the nations were led astray.
24In her was found the blood of prophets and of the saints,
and of all who have been killed on the earth."

2007-08-15T21:16:00.000+08:00

along the way to my godparent's home,
i went to starbucks to grab
(my beloved) caramel macchiato coffee<3

while waiting for the barista to whip up my coffee,
the guy at the counter decided to make small talk.
the convo went something like this-

guy: not working today ar?
me: huhh? no la *shakes head
guy: then what are you doing now?
me: schooling la..
guy: really? what's your sch?
me: RP..
guy: RP..? oh! Republic Poly ah?
me: yup

(machines churn- brrm brrm -for awhile.
sharene turns away and looks out of the window.
after a few seconds- )

guy: one tall caramel macchiato!
me: do i have to pass the receipt to you or something?
guy: err yah..*takes the receipt
(sharene turns to leave)
guy: have a nice day and enjoy your drink!
me: okay, thanks! :)

...

whatthe? do i look that old or something ._.
talked to luna abt it, this is what luna said-

luna: bel got into the cab last time
luna: taxi driver asked her
luna: u just finished shcool ah

bel is very much older than us,
she's this nice cat lady with this cat called Jack.
and did i mention?
Jack's a fat cat :P
honest, Jack's fat but cute.
SUPER CUTE! <3 :D

---

sharene adores-
almond coconut natural source shower foam-thing
caramel macchiato! :D
cranberry juice!

okay lah, so my olfactory nerve is super sensitive
to the smells around me.
yeah that's why my nose overloads and i get headaches sometimes

but that also means that
i get drawn to stuff that smells super freaking good,
be it willingly/unwillingly
whether it's shown/unshown.
but that's in the most extreme cases only lah :P

but thank heavens!

else you'll be seeing sharene behaving
a tad bit strange everytime a super nice smelling thing wafts by.
hahaha :X

2007-08-14T21:21:00.000+08:00

you want to know why i didnt want to go?

you and i, we play "poker".
you are probably the one who taught me the most about facades.

and yet, how ironic it is that you can't read me nor my reasons.

after being my guardians for so long, so many years-
still you can't understand how i think.

you think that i'm being lax at what i'm held to,
that i'm rejecting the very events themselves just because i'm in denial.

but the truth is-
i think that i'm not good enough.

are you happy now? that's my answer.
that the standard of my being is not to par.
and that, is why i disagreed with what the both of you wanted.
that is the reason i disagreed to do what i'm held to.

if by some fluke, you find my blog and see this entry-
dont say that it's my excuse.

long have you said that they were narrow-minded individuals.
i know. i'm not in the position to say this but-
you're not exactly the epitome of
being understanding people yourselves.

have you never tried to think from my my size 5half shoes?
what reason did you think have i that i would willingly avoid it?

i would have to face the very consequences of my decision everyday.
EVERYDAY!
it's emotional and psychological torture.

you can make that decision so easily,
because you didnt encounter nor face what i did.

you dont know how much i wanted to go,
how much i actually looked forward to it!

yet.. i can't.
i'm simply not good enough.

i realise now that i have to give up this long yearned for task.
let me improve,
i will complete this task in the future.

do not ask yourself the wrong questions.
the thing to ask is not "can i?", nor is it "should i?"
rather the very thing to ask is "will i?"

2007-08-13T19:28:00.000+08:00

wth?

kh was right in saying that it stunned me.
heck, i didnt know what to reply!

what the heck?
i know he's had a knack for jokes,
but this is taking it too far this time.
:/
i honestly don't know what i should reply that with.

---

i miss them. :(
sunyang's gonna go overseas to study soon.

i want those days back!
when i was ignorant of things that went by.
when reality doesn't really glomp me on the ass.

MISSED :(

crazy PS,crazy day.

`nuff said.

2007-08-12T15:33:00.000+08:00

grew boreded with the amazingly long session today.
today's MEIZHEN'S BIRTHDAY!
ohmyGOSH,
meizhen's just moved one step closer to oldage :P

dejavu, aint it?
for those who grew up in BPMC.
this place was renovated but they kept
this particular flight of stairs in place.

and FINALLY-

sometimes i wonder why i bother to ask people if they're alright.
and why i care so much :/
then i remember that their response doesn't really matter.
because i have my God. :)

i really need to learn to leave things to the Almighty.
and i need to lessen my pride.

bzzt.

2007-08-10T18:56:00.000+08:00

You Are a Black and White Cookie

You're often conflicted in life, and you feel pulled in two opposite directions.
When you're good, you're sweet as sugar. And when you're bad, you're wicked!

What Kind of Cookie Are You?

You Are An Intro-Extrovert!

Sometimes you're social - sometimes you're shy
You've got a bit of an Introvert / Extrovert split going on
You enjoy all sorts of situations. Parties, small groups, and alone time.
Too much of one, and you'll long for the other. You need variety!
Chances are, you've got both serious and fun friends - and they don't get along.

Are You An Extroverted or Introverted Girl?

2007-08-10T18:18:00.001+08:00

HERE'S WHAT WENT ON DURING THE CHAT BETWEEN JON AND I TODAY:
SPIDERPIG's jon.
!renerene.'s myself.

(3:50 PM) SPIDERPIG: you know something ..
(3:51 PM) !renerene.: >
(3:52 PM) !renerene.: *?
(3:52 PM) SPIDERPIG: was doing a little snooping today
(3:52 PM) SPIDERPIG: u were a totally different person in 2006 :/
(3:52 PM) !renerene.: whatyoumean
(3:52 PM) SPIDERPIG: character/attitude-wise
(3:52 PM) !renerene.: have meh
(3:52 PM) !renerene.: what changed?
(3:52 PM) SPIDERPIG: yeah ..
(3:52 PM) SPIDERPIG: u were more rational and thinking back then
(3:53 PM) SPIDERPIG: more willing to expose your heart
(3:53 PM) SPIDERPIG: now ... seems like after a lot of pain
(3:53 PM) SPIDERPIG: u shut yourself in
(3:53 PM) SPIDERPIG: and just ramble nonsense before acting like nothing happened the next day :/

AND ANOTHER:

(3:56 PM) SPIDERPIG: if theres 5 things you wanna see done right now, what would it be?
(3:56 PM) !renerene.: yeah i think so too
(3:56 PM) SPIDERPIG: huh .. what breakdown
(3:56 PM) !renerene.: nahh
(3:56 PM) !renerene.: i dont know
(3:56 PM) !renerene.: honestly
(3:56 PM) SPIDERPIG: i think you do
(3:56 PM) SPIDERPIG: you just dont want to admit them
(3:57 PM) SPIDERPIG: this will sound cliche
(3:57 PM) SPIDERPIG: but if u shut out the noises in ur brain
(3:57 PM) SPIDERPIG: and really listen to your heart
(3:57 PM) SPIDERPIG: i think you will find the answer ..
(3:57 PM) SPIDERPIG: regardless ...
(3:57 PM) SPIDERPIG: i really hope you'd come with me to see lionel one day =)
(3:58 PM) !renerene.: lionel?
(3:58 PM) !renerene.: HAH
(3:58 PM) !renerene.: ?
(3:58 PM) !renerene.: O_o
(3:58 PM) SPIDERPIG: counsellor ..
(3:58 PM) SPIDERPIG: i just hate to see you like this alrght ...
(3:58 PM) SPIDERPIG: im not saying u got some mental problem
(3:58 PM) SPIDERPIG: but give it a try ... uve got nothing to lose ..
(3:59 PM) SPIDERPIG: i think that you've already got a tough enough life to lead as it is
(3:59 PM) SPIDERPIG: school and family ..
(3:59 PM) SPIDERPIG: you dont need this emotional burden on you
(4:00 PM) SPIDERPIG: ill even go with you if u feel uncomfortable
(4:00 PM) SPIDERPIG: and leave when u want me to :/

---

suffice to say i need a counsellor..

...

Sharene doesnt need a SHRINK!
:(:(
stressed yeahh, but goodness-
i dont need a counsellor. right?
am i going crazy? ._.

yes, i'm lying to myself.
telling myself everything's alright.
that it's just a bad dream.
that it's all going to be okay at the end of the day.

the truth is i'm winning but i'm losing.

2007-08-09T20:05:00.000+08:00

È per l’amore che ti do
È per l’amore che non sai
Che mi fai naufragare
È per l’amore che non ho
È per l’amore che vorrei
È per questo dolore

--

i dont want to be sick!
no :(
suaydays
am watching ndp on tv now..
this yr's not that nice-
plus there's one woman in the backgrnd
that keeps shouting not singing.

ohmygosh can

2007-08-09T16:16:00.000+08:00

sometimes i really hate myself.
this is one of those times >.>

why oh why am i so adept in emotionless-ifying myself?
heck,i've got no idea.

if i say that no, i dont like jon that way-
people wont believe me.
if i say that "yes" i do,i'd be lying to everyone.
including myself.

and i'd be betraying mich.
>.>

no way.
heck no.

2007-08-08T19:15:00.000+08:00

at amos' and aaron's place now- the bbq.
just finished RJ.

kh's just next door >.>
let's hope he didnt hear what i told aaron. :P
hehe

crunk'd man.
today's sharene's suay-day.
nearly got kissed by a fast moving car just now can,
along the way to amos' and aaron's place.
CRUNK!
why am i so distracted? :(

2007-08-08T17:23:00.000+08:00

just saw kenny,ronald and alvin.
saw lots of other people from RP too.

NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
JON IS NOTNOTNOTNOTNOT WHO I LIKE
okay lah,if i did like him,which i dont-
i'd be betraying mich.
LIKE HELL I'D LIKE JON THAT WAY.

ohmygosh ohmygosh
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
went to watch simpsons with jon only lah.
jon + mich = couple = out of singapore

leaving poor sharene by herself :(

sharene likes someone else :)
:D:D:D

guess who? :P

2007-08-08T16:56:00.000+08:00

at cwp BK now.
lol.
*sigh

---

"It's About Time"

I hate you, I love you
I just can't remember to forget you
Who are you, who needs you?
You make me feel alive, I die, so high
I'm crawling on the ground
And I found I can fly

One of these days it all comes together
One of those days that goes on forever
Think it sounds crazy? Maybe, whatever
What's it all about?

[Chorus:]
It's about life, it's about fun
It's over before it has begun
It's about you, it's about me
It's about everything between and I say
I'm saying goodbye to you, I say hi to you with no clue
It's about time that I
Make up my mind

It's simple, confusing, the truth is I'm winning but I'm losing
And pulling and pushing, won't do me any good
It could, it should
I'm honest to myself that the truth is I lied

One of these days it all comes together
One of those days that goes on forever
Think it sounds crazy? Maybe, whatever
What's it all about?

[Chorus]

Time is creeping behind me, surrounding around me
Fading the words so desperately
Now give me a reason that I can believe in
Time is something you can't rewind
One of these days it all comes together
One of those days that goes on forever
Think it sounds crazy? Maybe, whatever
What's it all about?

[Chorus]

2007-08-08T09:13:00.000+08:00

what kind of problem statement is this?!
blahblahblah~
jon's going overseas to study for 5 YEARS.
and WHAT?! HE'S GONNA MIGRATE!?!?!

CRUNK YOU! :(
dammit grumpoot. :((

DAMMIT, WHY'S EVERYONE GOING OVERSEAS? x(((

sometimes i really hate getting close to people.
i hate it when i'm hurt and helpless. :(
especially when they 'leave'.

like HOORAY, mich has gone overseas.
now it's jon's turn.
poof yawl! X(

crunkit. x(((((

2007-08-07T17:45:00.000+08:00

jodale, companero de clase.

this is stupid.
i'm so disappointed in you.
i thought you were smarter than that.
it is how darn obvious.
for goodness sakes,
if you want to shoot-
then shoot me.

do not bring any other people in.
dont purposely shoot them.

our team and kenny's team kena shot.
please dont include others when you obviously want only us.
period. :)

2007-08-06T21:44:00.000+08:00

dick lee

this video never ceases to amuse me.
*snicker

SPIDERPIG SPIDERPIG! :D:D:D:D
wed: BBQ at Amos'
thurs: national day

SPIDERPIG :D:D:D

2007-08-04T11:17:00.000+08:00

lots of crunked up things happening lately.
really felt destructive last night.

i could even remember what emotions they were-
hurt,disappointment,frustration,sadness,helplessness.
and for the record-
i hate feeling helpless and hurt.
so yeah, you can see how i began to feel destructive.

was dumb lah, last night, told jan that i felt crunked
and he told me to get laid.
told jon what jan said, and jon said that it doesnt sound too bad of an idea.

fat load of good that advice is. >.>

well, at least i'm feeling better today,
still abit raw though(the shoulders).
hitched a ride! :D
got abit lost though *snicker
stayed up till 3plus last night to doodle,
partly cause i didnt feel like sleeping too.

dont tell me these pictures look somewhat familiar-
if you know what i'm doodling, then it's good for you :P
though i admit my doodles sucked.

... -what? it was 3am!
who doodles well at 3? i was wonky by then too! >.>

and yes, i'm complicated.
you just can't comprehend how complicated i am.
=)

if you can see beyond my many facades,
you can know the kind of person i am.

though i doubt many can.

dont ask me why i'm so distant,
because the only person in class i can really trust and relax around-
is jeremy.

well,yeah-
i admit, i cant relax easily in class.
i dont know why too =/

---

for your information, dont ask me why i'm sortof enjoying pain-
go read below.

when pain within and outside is mixed up and,
when it's so much that you just want to get away from it all,
you try to find a way to differentiate
between physical hurt and emotional hurt.

when you get used to pain,
you reach a sort of euphoria that
you can't touch when you are living through everyday life.
the pain comes with the euphoria i guess.

i guess,it's easier to enjoy pain
when the lines between pain and pleasure are blurred.

2007-08-02T19:55:00.001+08:00

goodgrief.
don't screw yourself.
you can run from the world-
but you can't run from yourself.
if you can't accept reality as it is when you are in school-
you're going to drown in the world out there.

politics exist everywhere,
what you are doing proves that you are
not mature enough to handle criticisms.
Nor are you able to even try to settle problems.

pathetic you. :\

No, i'm not b*tching about anyone.
i'm not even complaining.
i'm stating my opinions-
since it is not me who loses out in the end. :)

---
TODAY:

MICHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! :D:D:D:D

well, crunk'd.
shoulders are pink-red.
hurts. :(
i predict a C/B for enterprise today.
cronko >.>

did a test on my personality-
hey i was bored okay!
D:

---
(from personalitytest.com)

ENFJ
(Extravert, Intuitive, Feeler, Judger)

People of this type tend to be:
affectionate, articulate, and tactful;
highly empathetic but easily hurt;
creative,original, and articulate communicators;
decisive and passionately opinionated,
very expressive with strong, sincere, value-based opinions
productive, organized, and responsible leaders.

The most important thing to ENFJs
is their relationships,
and the opportunity to
communicate and connect with others.

2007-08-01T20:09:00.000+08:00

darn tired sia..
just returned not long ago. :D

went to sentosa today,
am chaota-ed. lol
aft sentosa went to bpp-
met yesiang there. :DD

---
life is such that there is no stability in any situation-
no matter how certain the world around you may seem.

just thinking about how backstabbing/bitching came about.
it comes about when we are unhappy with
certain people,and start to complain.
from there, word gets passed around and
the complaint soon becomes backstabbing.

so in actuality,backstabbing is complaining.
lol.